Failed

Sorry im sucha fuckg failed daughter. I pissed my Mummy off on her big day. She found out about my tattoo and friggin' flare her top. She didn't touch the cake i baked for her @ all and flew into a rage upon seeing the cake. She rather sleep on the sofa and on the hard wooden floor then share the Queen-sized bed w me. She ignored me totally. I rather she takes a chopper and slash me up then flaring up b'cus her heart dont deserve all these pressure she's going thru. She ignored me totally from the moment i stepped out of the house and came back w a Famous Amos 'Happy Birthday' cookie(but i guessed i've t throw it away or eat myself) and how the fuck am i gonna redeemed myself?! I posted this morning on Fb that i've quit smokg but i broke the promise this evening 'cus i've no one w me to handle this shit together ugh ugh ugh. To think i can't even handle my own situation but yet i became sucha asshole and helped others than myself. This is the fourth time my Mum cried for me(basically 'cus she was fuckg hurt) and i dont understand why my family have to go thru all these crap w me.. Sorry i think i suck ttm so fml and bye